Her life

By submitting a story to the site "Man and woman"I had no idea how many people care about it address the topic. Of course, there were those that contained not too friendly proposals among the responses. However, they are not interested in me, but primarily those which spoke of the loneliness - physical and mental.
It turns out that many wonder: as a young woman got into such a situation? In the meantime, this situation is typical for sure, just not everyone is willing to share with others the most cherished. One of the scenarios - in front of you.
...She was very puritan-minded mother, who is that below the belt, considered a taboo topic and shameful. Therefore, until all had to reach his mind, making his - often fatal - error. She gave herself for the first time only because it was looking for warmth and protection, which do not receive at home. All of her knowledge about the physical side of love was taken from books, secretly given by her friends, and of meaningless conversations with the same young people like herself. She did not go out on dates, did not know how to flirt, and all I could afford - only to secret meetings. From this her first feeling was of the stamp of guilt and shame.
Marrying at 18, she was no longer a girl, but did not become a woman. It was not yet the fear of self-manifestation, but only ignorance of itself. The marriage to her was a major break from the yoke of maternal care. But neither she nor her boy-husband did not manage to fully enjoy the intimacy. Although this happens quite often, but rather resembled a mating rabbits: hastily, almost caressing, and certainly - without pleasure. She did not love him (though she still did not love anyone, except the first), but was grateful for the opportunity to be away from his mother. She told him not changed - there was no need, but soon realized that this boy live with her interesting: they were too different. They parted smoothly, and after a few years she had almost forgotten.
However, with the return to the family home and return all previous issues. Once again, on her way there was a man to whom she also reached all - from despair. It was then, when she was just 20, and was the awakening of women. It did not happen all of a sudden, it just gradually realize their desires, I learned to feel your body, understand and accept the man. Probably arose in her passion would be made happy partner, but raised by his mother shame not allowed to talk openly about what she wants. Meanwhile, it was found that the husband's alcoholism (of any she had known before the wedding, and from whom she fondly dreamed it to deliver) began to progress, which affected not only the situation in the family, but also on its potency. Now their intimacy occurs no more often than once every two or three months, and was built under the scheme: "Come quickly to the bathroom, we have 10 minutes before the movie". She once somehow calculated and discovered with amazement and horror, that they do have sex 1.5 hours per year. In year...
I think it was then that she found salvation in the same bathtub where she periodically driven to the five-minute tupping. Exploring her body, she found that a strong stream of water directed at the clitoris, is very pleasant, but obviously something is missing. At the same time, trying to somehow appease the demands of his body, it is, perhaps, many began to experiment with objects, even remotely resembling a member. And finally combined the two steps: aiming the jet shower and spray out of deodorant. Now she has the opportunity to get an orgasm, but then she always feels devastated and often had a headache. The fact that it is - multiorgastichnaya woman, but can not "fly" in the bathroom more than once: it becomes no longer nice and nasty.
Some time later, traveling on the Internet, she discovered anal sex, and she was curious. However, the first impression is spoiled natural body fluids, after which she always was the pre-use enema. The second balloon gave her the opportunity to experience another orgasm, and, as it turned out, not at all similar to the vaginal.
Now, that is her life today. From her husband she was gone, but the inner aversion does not allow her to bring any non-binding and tricks "disposable" partners, but it is her and uninteresting. She has a daughter, she does not want a repetition of their own destiny, and therefore easily answer questions arising in the child. And from time to time, when once a week, when almost every day - she sits in front of the computer and opens the stories, and then goes into the bathroom, where she was waiting for "faithful companions". It includes water, sits down, spreads her legs, sends a strong jet on the clitoris, puts the balloon into the vagina or anus (and sometimes - in both places at the same time), closes his eyes - and imagine that there is no soul, no steadfast cans, but there are hands that embrace and caress her, there are lips that kissed her, there is a member who enters into it deeper and stronger. And then she cries, and the muscles are compressed, forcing the foreign object in her body spasm passes, and then she opens her eyes and crying because flipped another page of self-deception ...
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